I find that recently I've been looking at the small picture too much and that's why I've been getting so frustrated. I think I read the same thing in Amanda's blog. I'd like to step back and look at things from the bird's eye view. It's been hard to find the time to think about anything other than "Do I have any homework?, Did I do my laundry?, Oh god I need sleep, Did I eat properly today?, Where the fuck is my keys?, I'm running late again, When will she shut up? I'm getting another pimple!"

In a week it will be a year anniversary of when Kyle broke up with me. It doesn't seem that long ago, but yet I know that I've moved so far away from where I was. (And no I don't mean just geographically....I know what all you jokester are thinking)

I need to listen to music more. Please leave suggestions of bands or songs for me to listen to! (And I'll look at Amanda's blog to see the bands that I know that she's mentioned to me, but it's kinda gone in one ear and out the other, sorry!)

I feel bad for Michelle. Everyone I know and everyone she knows won't be here next year. This place is a bus station.

Today I had one of the worse headaches I've had in years. I got up from bed and reached into my drawer to pull out a bowl. I felt something on my hand, when I looked down there was a lizzard! I screamed my head off. It was the last straw of the day and it took all of my energy. How do I explain this? I layed my head down and realized how something so insignfigant upset me so much. I guess it's happening to me because I've never been this busy before in my life. (Even though compared to some, it's not that busy) I need to become one with nature again. Sitting outside, observing or mediting outside reminds me of the beauty of life, the connectedness, and the grand scheme of things. I need to start my transcendental trail.